Day 11 of 100

Once upon a time I was a fashion icon.

Growing up in California I pretty much wore t-shirts, shorts, and flip flops. I always said it was because I didn’t really care about fashion, but the truth was that as a chubby kid and my parents really didn’t have any money so if I was going to get something “cool,” it would be an off-brand or second hand.

It was easier if I was just not into fashion and defaulted to t-shirts, shorts, and flip flops. I once wore shorts for 373 days in a row. I wore my flip flops down until I had to use safety pins to keep the straps together. Pretending that I didn’t care, didn’t remove the shame I felt going without and I knew there was no way I could tell my parents how I felt.

I became great at pretending that nothing really bothered me, when the truth was I was constantly aware of my difference. So I leaned into not caring and that has stuck with me for most my life.

Living in Boulder in the late ’00s/early ‘10s was wonderful. We had a real community that supported one another. I felt that I belonged, but like most of my life, I also felt separate from everyone.

So among the many things I did, run a sushi eating contest (I won eating 89 pieces), starting a mediocre Rock Band Band, mentoring at Techstars, and various other community activities, I started Micah Chic, a Tumblr blog of me wearing t-shirts, shorts, and flip flops and taking fashion shots.

I’m not sure what I expected. That the shame I felt not wearing cool clothes (at that time) because of my weight could be replaced with humor. I was wrong, you know. I was never going to be okay with me until I accepted me as I was.

And that is a journey I am still on.