Day 96 of 100

“I can do it myself.”

I have spent more than five years in recovery, and I have never heard a story about successful sobriety that included the sentence “I did it myself.”

Including my story.

I first stopped doing drugs in 2006. I stopped drinking about three months later, and stopped smoking maybe 8 months. In essence, I locked myself in my house and white knuckled it the best I could for a year.

I had gone to five AA meetings years prior due to a DUI, and I hated it. It felt so fake and forced and I just couldn’t relate to the people. I knew that AA wasn’t for me, but when I decided to get sober in 2006, something told me that it worked so I chose the steps I wanted to follow and threw out the rest.

The first relapse was smoking. Honestly smoking is the hardest habit to kick. I did all the things: stopped buying cigarettes, only bummed cigarettes, only in social situations, etc. None of it worked.

The second relapse was drinking. It started with just one drink on a weekend, then it was a few drinks, then a few more, and then on various days of the week. I wasn’t drinking as much as I did before, but I couldn’t keep a full bottle of alcohol in my house longer than a day. So I stopped buying bottles.

No matter how much I tried to stay sober on my own, I constantly ended up failing.

Compare that to now. I don’t even have the desire to drink. I haven’t had a cigarette in years. I am the happiest and healthiest I have been in a very long time.

The difference? I accepted help. I sat with others and listened to their stories. I work with a sponsor, I sponsor people, I go to meetings, I even spend time with folks outside of meetings.

I know now that the secret to success is not walking a path alone, but by asking, and accepting, the help of others. My story now involves people, lots of people.

Just like it should be.